Dear Friends and Family,

The Merriest of Christmas' to you and best wishes for a Happy New Year!

This is my first attempt at an electronic Christmas card.  Please forgive the informal transfer method.  I admit I really dislike writing-out Christmas cards, but I do love receiving them.  So I guess I better return the courtesy if we're going to stay on your greetings list!

This has been a year of many changes for us.  Our family dynamic has shifted so much with the loss our precious daughter Rowan in early 2009, and as we work through our grief and move forward in our lives, we find lots of changes come with that.  All are good, but bittersweet, as they happen without Rowan around cheering us on.  We miss her so, as you can imagine.  Our hearts are heavy, but rest assured, we are healing, and moving through our grief as we should.  Time does heal most wounds.  The loss of a child is not something you ever fully get over, but you can move forward.  And I have no doubt it is what Rowan would want for us.  Thank you to all who have been so supportive and loving to us over these difficult months.  We could not have gone through it without you.

Laurel.  Oh how she has changed and grown.  She's just completed her first year of preschool, and loves it.  Over the last 12 months she has left behind her crib, diapers, her pacifier, and moved onto Barbies, her doll house, spelling her name, and bossing our cat, Jezebel, around.  She'd been talking about Santa since Halloween, and reminding me on nearly a daily basis, that I better be good, or Santa will not bring me a present.  She is a great joy in our life. And we're very proud of her.  For the first time in many years our house is no longer baby-zone-central.  The gates have come down, and most of the baby gear is gone.

However, the baby gates may come back, as we are looking for a new family dog.  Our beloved Molly, passed away last year (2009 was a tough year for us) and I really miss her companionship.  She was an awesome dog, even though she'd sneak food from the table, and mope about when she was feeling neglected.  I can only hope that we'll find another dog who can be loved as much as we loved her. 

Bryan has been traveling much for his job this year.  A big change for our household.  And he's spent so much time in Europe that I've been teasing him that he may lose his American citizenship.  Its probably not a joking mater, but he has been gone for roughly 6 weeks this year.  He's getting very familiar with the customs of Germany.  He's tried lots of new foods, and seen some amazing sights (The Black Forest in Germany is a highlight).  His German co-workers are very hospitable and seem to have an endless ability to entertain. Next year he is looking forward to trips to China, Brazil, and Germany. 

And changes for myself this year, the best change is setting up my sewing area and getting involved with my local quilting guild.  I've taken lots of sewing classes, and my craft is improving.  This has been an important outlet for my grief.  Getting the creative juices flowing is energizing and therapeutic.  Of course its also incredible time consuming.  So my many other activities, like gardening, photography, keeping house, laundry, have been pushed to the bottom of the to-do pile.  Oh well.  Those pursuits will wait for me. 

The highlight of the year is our trip to Norway in August.  We so enjoyed the scenery, our time with good friends, and being together.  If you want to review our trip, you can the 700+ photos here (we got a bit carried away with the camera - but it is a beautiful country).

It was a good year and we are grateful for all the many god things in our life.  We have our health, good employment, a warm home.  All things that can easily be taken for granted, as many of our friends and neighbors are going without during these difficult economic times. We must remember this, not just now, but everyday.

And of course we have each other and all of you.

To all of you who received this message today.  Our warmest wishes to you for a peaceful, happy holiday season.  And healthy New Year!

Bryan, Colleen, our Angel Rowan, and Laurel Eliza Sibthorp

Merry Christmas from the Sibthorps!

Click here to view this photo book larger

Decorating for Christmas

We finally got around to digging out our Christmas decorations this weekend. Tree, check. Lights, check. Great photos of Laurel, check. Shopping for presents for our loved ones, un-check.

At least the house looks good. And its too cold and snowy to go out.

We've been talking about it for months. Waiting for it to happen. Plotting, planning, and now we have finally acted.

Laurel Eliza gave up her pacifiers.

We are so very proud of her. And it turns out, Mom and Dad were just as hooked as she was. It meant a good nights sleep for everyone... Who would be crazy enough to mess with that formula? Who you ask? The dentist, or at least the threat of what the dentist will say.

But so far 36 hours and counting.

Truth be told, I don't think she used it that much. She was only allowed to have them at bed and naptime, when she was at home. Never at school. And often, I heard them plunk to the floor, shortly after bedtime.

Now if we could just figure out this daylight savings time, we'd be off to the races.

Happy Halloween

Halloween (more photos here) is done, but I'm sure we have enough candy to last us until next Halloween.

Laurel had a blast. She was hesitant about it all when I dressed her up on Friday to visit daddy's office, but she quickly got into the spirit of it. On Sunday night, when our neighbors were trick-or-treating, she really got into it. And she loved every part of it: the costume, giving away candy, getting candy. When we were handing out the candy, she would meet the kids halfway down the driveway. She kept the bucket of candy with her most of the evening, and kept repeating to herself "You say Trick or Trick and Thank You." Its not very likely she'll forget this for a while.

She might still be doing it at Christmas...

More October Photos

Whew, its been a whirlwind of a month. When will it be over? Much too quickly for me. And I loved our extended Indian Summer.

But to briefly recap our month, Rowan's benches were finally installed (as you saw on my last post), Bryan traveled to Germany for 10 days, Colleen and Laurel had visits from family and friends while he was away. We celebrated Bryan's 40th birthday, and my Dad's 75th - Happy Birthday to both of you, again. Colleen (and family) survived the annual weeklong Fall fund-drive for public radio. But not without Laurel and Colleen getting pretty sick with nasty lower respiratory bugs. We ate out far too much, took too few pictures (which you can see here), and not a lot of quilting or sewings been going on. And here we are sliding into November (and gasp the Holidays) like its the final pitch of the all-star game. Whew.

So what's new with you?

A place to rest

These benches were installed last week at Rowan's school. The money to pay for them came from a variety of sources, memorial gifts from friends and family, birthday and angel day gifts as well. But finally, they have been installed. And what a pleasure it is to see them in their permanent home at her school. You can see a few more photos of the project here.

Thank you to everyone who participated in the project.

One-block-wonder quilting

Finally, a new post. I've been trying to post this photo for a week now, via an iphone app, and I have to admit, for once, it did not work. Most disheartening.

But back to the photo, this is image is of the project I'm currently working on, my On-Block-wonder titled "Watercolor". I've moved to the quilting stage and these 4 threads are what I have chosen to quilt it with. Currently, I've got about 40% done. I can't wait to see the finished project. Its very organic and natural, and without a plan. Almost artsy.

This technique is musch easier than it looks. I consider myself a novice/intermediate quilter, and I easily picked up this technique. Give it a try - its fun to see how the colors turn out.

Good night for a birthday.

It was a good birthday. Thank you to all - I am overwhelmed.

Here's tonights forecast for the moon. I hope you see this post in time to enjoy it. The following is from Mel Peterson, retired Physics Professor, Augustana.

If the sky is clear tonight look for a special full moon, the Harvest Moon. As the sun sets in the west a full moon will rise in the east. Northern summer ends at 10:09 CDT – the autumnal equinox – as autumn begins. The planet Jupiter, the very Bright planet Jupiter, will be near the fullMoon. As the night progresses both the moon and Jupiter will move up and across the sky and will be visible most of the night. Most of the time the full Harvest Moon occurs before or after the autumnal equinox. The last time the Harvest Moon happened with the equinox was in 1991. If the sky is clear you should be able to understand why this Moon became the “Harvest Moon.”

You might also notice that the Moon, when it is near the horizon, appears to be unusually wide. This is the not-well-understood moon illusion. Hold a quarter at arms length and check out the size of the moon lw in the east and compare when it gets high overhead. Same size?

On the night of the 20-21 Jupiter was closer than it will be until 2022. And it will remain closer to Earth for the next few weeks. The Moon willrise about an hour later each night and will be in its waning phase. It of course will be farther to the East each night. Jupiter will continue to be brighter than any star for several weeks. If you have access to binoculars try to spot the 4 bright moons of Jupiter. They can be spotted with“steady” binoculars.

No new photos to share.

Instead, a tender moment to share.

And I can't believe I don't have any new photos of Miss Laurel to post. I'm sure she's grown 5 inches and conquered the world since my last post...

Miss you, Ro.

What Can I Say?

Nothing.

Home again..

We are home safe from our trip to Norway. We had such a great time visiting friends and touring the Northern parts of Norway. Thank you again, to our great hosts, the Constant Family, for your hospitality.

Its been a bumpy start to the week, but I think by today (Wednesday) we're getting back to our stride. Laurel was really affected by the time shift and woke on Monday morning at 2 AM ready to start her day. And decided right then, she no longer requiring a crib. After some arguing, cajoling, and finally giving in 2 hours later, we got up, converted her crib to a big girl bed (even though it wasn't meant to do so, please be advised it is safe and sound), and started the day. I think we are finally getting our stride back.

The first photo in this post is a photo of our front door.  If you look close you can see some of our neighborhood in the reflection of the glass. Its good to see friends and its good to be home.

Immediately returning from vacation, Laurel moved up to the much desired (by her) Threes Room at the Y preschool program.  This is an important milestone for Laurel - being potty trained was required.  We have been working on potty training since December with little success, and she did it all by herself while we traveled to and from Norway.  Another reminder that she will come to these things when she is ready. 

The second photo in this post is of her first "official" artwork for the school year that she created yesterday.  Its very sweet and reminded me many happy memories of Rowan's first days of school.  I have no doubt Laurel will provide us with lots of those kind of memories too. 

And finally, I have finished uploading all our photos of Norway.  If you have the time and desire to view all 700+ photos, you can view them here. 

Back to Bodo

Back to Bodo for more sightseeing.  Check out new photos here.

Viking Museum/Lofoten/Borg

Today we visited raided and pillaged the Viking Museum on Lofoten. More photos here.  

Lofoten

Lofoten ønsker oss velkommen. Kong Harold as seen from our rooms.

Pictures!

And More Here!

Daylight

View from our porch @ 10:20pm.

Who doesn't love fabric...

Laurel loves fabric. When I'm sewing, she likes to go through my stash and tryout new outfits, put her babies down for naps under "blankets", build "roads" to drive her school bus on - all from my stash. I love seeing her be creative.

We're off on an adventure for the next few weeks. We'll return with lots of photos of the actic circle, oceans, fjords, and more when we we return.

Lots of new photos...

Check out the new photos albums I've post for June and July. I've been so busy doing and taking photos, I've not made time to post.  So enjoy these photos and check out how much our little one is changing.

When we're not playing in the sprinklers and fountains to keep cool, we've been busy planning our trip to Norway next month.  We are getting very excited. Any travel tips for a 28 hour flight with a 3 year old you would like to share?

I've been busy working on my quilts, you can check them out here.  Laurel's been doing great at her new preschool and we're having some success with potty training.  And Bryan - in addition to getting to know his new car - has been working lots of extra hours at the office planning the future of the company. 

And that really sums up June and July so far. 

Happy Birthday Rowan Margaret!

Here are some birthday photos I'd like to share.

Rowan, age 8.

Rowan, age 3.

We miss you so very much.

My other little sunshine turned 3 today.

Happy Birthday Laurel Eliza.

Thank you for coming into our life.  We love you so much.  And its a joy to orbit your world everyday. Because that's what its like living with a toddler - you orbit them, and they are a bright, bright sun.

Today my baby turned 3 years old.  Any day now she'll be potty trained and sleeping in a big girl bed.*  We have so much to look forward to.  Kindergarten.  Reading.  Sports and extra-curricculars.  Middle school.  Driving.  Young love.  Proms.  Graduation.  College.   Real, everlasting love (hopefully in that order).   Her whole life is ahead of her.

But why does it make me sad that she's getting older?  I should be looking forward to those things, right?  All I can think of is that ABBA song "slipping through my fingers".   It makes me tear up just thinking about it.  And she's only three.

So I need to get a grip.  What would my sisters say?  Hang on tightly?  Or let them be themselves and enjoy your relationship with them?  Sigh.


Then and Now.

Love, Colleen

*We're working on it.

PS Check out the photos I've uploaded from today here.  

I've been blessed

to be their Momma.

Happy Mother's Day!

Its May?

Where did April go?  What did we do in April?  I hardly remember.  I barely took any photos - at least it seemed that way.  I didn't do much sewing.  I'm sure we have something to show for the month of April, but for the life of me, I don't know what it is.

So let me think back...  First weekend of April was Easter - we traveled to visit family.  I've got some photos of Laurel on her Egg hunt.

The second weekend of April, we intended to visit our new cousin, Jacob, but it did not work out, and the weather was great so we worked in the yard all weekend. Becky came to visit and we shopped for some new trees - 2 Canadian Hemlocks and a Rowan tree.  They're in now and you can see some photos in my April album. By Monday, I was really sick with a sinus infection - I actually had to go to the doctor, and missed some work.   I think it was the result of a strong allergic reaction to the compost I had spread on Sunday - lots of leaf mold.

The third weekend in April, we had planned to attend the IL SOFT mini-conference in Oakland, IL.  But Laurel seemed to be coming down with a cold, and we didn't want to share that with any of our special SOFT families - those kiddos do not need to be exposed to Laurel's pre-school germs.  Again, we spent the weekend doing what - I'm not sure.  

But finally on the fourth weekend of April, our plans came together.  I went to St. Charles MO with my sisters and Bryan and Laurel entertained our good friend Tom at home.

I did take a few photos, which you can view here, of the changing spring landscape at our house, as well as a few good shots of Laurel.

So the goal for May is to not let so much time pass before I blog again - otherwise the whole year will pass me by with nothing to remind me of the events in our household.

Until my next post, I hope you are all well.  Feel free to drop us a line telling us what you've been doing as well.

Colleen

Sunny Sunday morning.

We've been quite busy around our household this past week.  I finished up a week-long fundraiser at work, Laurel had a nasty bout with bronchitis, Nanny's has a bumpy road with her dialysis treatments, and Bryan played Mr. Mom.  Grandma and Grandpa even came down and bailed us out on Thursday.  (Thanks again Mom & Dad).  In fact, as I write, Bryan is off to the office to catch up on missed work.

Laurel is feeling much better, but she ran a pretty high temp for 4 days and gave us a bit of a scare.  But she  bounced back as only a 2 year old with lots of energy can do.

The weather has been so nice here.  Lots of 50 and 60's degree days, with cool nights.  We haven't really spent much time outside yet, but we're starting to itch to work in the yard.  We've been inspecting the plants every few days to see what's coming up.  And we're anxiously awaiting the bloom on the Star Magnolia.  I'm just glad the grass came back from all the construction we did last summer in the front yard.

I wish I could think of more share today.  Guess I've got a bit of a block - too tired to think.  But I have lots of new photos which you can see here.  Here's a sample.

Get out your tissues...today is National Trisomy 18 awareness...

This video was shared on the the Faces of Trisomy webpage recently.  And in honor of our sweet girl, I'd like to share it.



We miss you, Rowan Margaret.

Finally, Mom let me play in the snow.

 

Mom finally let me play in the snow.  Everyday she says its too cold for me to go outside.  

But today it was warm and we had fresh snow.  And I got to play outside.  How do you like my snowman?

Love, Laurel

Everyone has a twin...somewhere in the world.

Bryan checking his email - oh wait - its Laurel.  

Its so hard to tell them apart sometimes.  Headband, rolled up shirt sleeves and a computer.  How's a mother to know?

Princess Laurel and Her royal steed Rody...

This weeks photos to share: Princess Laurel and Her Steed.

As many of you are aware I am not fond of Laurel's princess costumes - mostly because of the personality she adopts when waving her wand - but I could not resist these photos when she started attempting to mount Rody (that's the horses name) and was having difficulty managing her shoes, dress and wand. She's such a girl...

Traveling again this weekend - off to a 50th Wedding Anniversary celebration in Wisconsin, and we are looking forward to seeing family.  February is a busy month for us, we have just one weekend free and then Bryan travels to Germany for 10 days at the end of the month.  (Halleluiah - his new passport came in time.)  I'm glad this month is going by quickly, because spring will be here sooner.  Anyone else tired of snow?

The week behind and ahead both had full schedules for us.  Bryan did some traveling, Laurel was healthy enough to go to preschool both days, at home we've been working on Valentines, and I've been keeping busy with my quilting.  Bryan's dad's birthday was on Thursday and we were able to spend some time with him via Skype.  Really fun.  It was a good week.

You can see more photos of Princess Laurel here.

And until my next post, be well.
Colleen

Off to a wedding in Bollingbrook this weekend...

We've been busy this week. Taxes - Check. Bryan travel to Horicon, WI for work - check. Laurel comes down with her sixth cold since Dec. 1 - check.

Except for the ongoing battle for her to develop an immunity to the common cold, she's doing great at preschool. She loves her teacher, and her friends - Rachel (who is actually how she collectively refers to the Hoppe sisters) and Rosey. I don't have any new photos to share, but I'll remedy that soon. Until then, you can always check out our webalbums.

Until I can post more, have a great weekend and stay warm.

Colleen

Eight

Enchanting. Rowan could draw a smile from the most unhappy person with her sparkle, her harmonic coo and smile. Strangers would be drawn from a distance to stop and say hello. And most of the time they were so enchanted by her charms they didn't notice the wheelchair, or the fact she did not say a word. She had communicated enough with her visitors that they left her feeling lighter, happier, enchanted. Once she did this repeatedly on a shopping trip so that by the time we left the store she was flexing her hands and toes in excitement, and her final target stopped us on the way out to ask if she was self-propelled. Enchanted.

Bath time. Bath time has always been a popular activity in our house, but for Rowan she really liked the warm water, splashing, playing with her toys. She even liked the part when you get out of the tub and the air is so cold, and I'd wrap her up quickly and rough her up to keep her warm. She'd coo and sing, and get very excited. She liked to have lotion massaged on her skin and have her wet hair combed. And often she was quite wound up by the time she was dressed and ready to start the bedtime wind down. It would then take her a long time to get sleepy. And being naked. She really liked that part.

Bryan and I both acknowledge this charm. We called it Ro-Therapy. She had the ability to wash away all your woes, worries and complaints. WIth a tender little pat, or one of her infamous smiles and a harmonic coo, and poof! Gone. Done. You were right where you needed to be and thinking about what mattered most, and no longer letting the everyday confuse your priorities. I wish we could have bottled that. We'd have made millions - if we could have been convinced to share it with the world.

Love pats. Although Rowan enjoyed being cuddled, she had a special way letting you know that she loved you. She'd just pat you, or touched you with her foot. Nothing major, just a subtle resting of her foot on your leg, or side. Or she would put her hand on your forearm. She wanted you to know she was near, and we could go on doing whatever activity we were doing, and the she loved us.

Motivation. She wasn't fast, or a ball of burning hot sun-like energy like her baby sister. But she never lost her motivation to work had or play hard at anything she did. She just plodded along through all her therapies and exercises without complaint. Steady, and unrelenting. She made our job so easy - doing it all without complaint.

Fathers and daughters. What a happy memory I have of her daddy snuggling with her. Carefully picking her up and cradling her everyday. She trained him very well. Got him on her program: she was the center of the universe. She prepped him for Laurel - passed the torch and shared it. Its an amazing sight.

ABBA. I can't possibly leave this off the list. She loved music and especially ABBA. I suspect that she knew that the lyrics were easy to sing along to and the rhythm very dance-able. She was guaranteed singing and dancing - her favorite. I can remember once as we were commuting across town, and Super Trouper (her theme song) came on the radio. I wasn't really paying attention to her as I was driving and I heard her coo in excitement. Her song was on.

Everyday Sunshine. Everyday was pure sunshine. To be a caretaker of such good and untainted love and happyness was such an honor. I never really felt that Bryan and I were responsible for teaching her these things; but rather our job was to just take care of such an angelic creature while she was here with us. And it was an honor. Everyday she brought us sunshine.

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you. (From Our Children by Kahlil Gibran)


We love you sweet girl and miss you.

Now you're cooking...

Laurel spent the WHOLE day in the kitchen. Not my kitchen - hers. We cashed in some Christmas gift cards and purchased her this.

She cooked way more than 3 meals today; did a lot of laundry..and had a blast the whole time.

I knew this was what she wanted when she climbed all over the floor model at Target. How could we not come home with it? Did I tell you that it took Bryan 2 hours to assemble? Now she has the whole set, pots, pans, tableware apron, and the plastic food. Its all there. And she loves it. I don't think she's every played with anything for so long. More photos here.

We're all fighting a cold - or Laurel's cold. So far this winter - Laurel 4 since Dec 1. Colleen 2 since Dec 1, and Bryan 1. Its going to be a long time until Spring. I finally took Laurel to see the pediatrician on Thursday when she spiked a temp. Double ear infection. She is finally starting to improve - after 3 days on the antibiotics. I was starting to get concerned that she did not have a strong enough med to fight the infection. But today she is better. And Bryan and I seem to have mild versions of it.

Thats all for this week. Not much else to report. And until my next post,

Be well,

Colleen